As discussed on the Confidence & Assertiveness page, when you feel that you can do something, this means that you have self confidence. Now does that mean that you have a high self esteem too?
Self Confidence is your belief in your ability to do things well. Remember; confidence is the by–product of the habit of success. Self Esteem on the other hand, is the way in which you think about yourself. If you like yourself, then you have high self esteem.
Some people have high self confidence but low self esteem.
For example, a singer who knows that he or she has a great voice is confident, but refuses to let others hear them sing because they have low self esteem, and simply don’t ‘like’ themselves. Self esteem then refers to one's opinion of one's self. Self esteem is internal feelings, and self–confidence is the outward expression of those feelings.
You may know that you are really smart. Internally, you process this fact and gain self esteem in the area of knowledge. Then you go to take a verbal exam. All of a sudden, you feel nervous and start to sweat. You begin to doubt that you will pass the test. You still know you are smart, but you doubt your ability to communicate that to others – therefore you lack self confidence.
We spend our lives ‘doing’ things. We do some things very well, and others not so well. So what changes between something where the outcome was very good and where it was less so?
The chances are that we do things well that we prepare and plan for. This is also true when it comes to Goal Setting and Visualising. When we see the end result or outcome in our mind’s eye, this in turn focuses our attention on what is required to achieve the result. When the result is achieved we are performing at our peak.
When our self esteem is high, we are better able to visualize outcomes and plan and prepare to do what is required to make the outcome a reality.
As we grow develop and mature, at an unconscious level we form what psychologists refer to as Core Beliefs. A Core Belief is something that we tell ourselves regularly about who we are and how we behave.
Naturally Core Beliefs come in two types:
When we allow our behavior to be influenced by poor and non–supportive core beliefs this in turn has a direct influence on our levels of performance.
We can improve our level of self–esteem, since it is based on what we learned, and then we can re–learn what we think of ourselves and our abilities. Anything that has been learned can be re–learned.
As humans, out total outlook on who we are and what we are capable of is a product of our conditioning (those Core Beliefs). When you accept that this is how we became who we are today, and then it makes sense to also believe that by changing or re–conditioning belief patterns and behaviors, we can alter the outcome and increase our performance levels.
Using NLP techniques and tried and tested Suggestion therapy we can replace poor and non–supportive core Beliefs with new, good, supportive ones, and when the transformation takes place, the results can be truly amazing.
If you feel that you are limiting your potential as a result of inappropriate core beliefs that are affecting your Self Esteem & Peak Performance, and then talk to the BLHC about the ways that we can help with this.